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School really pisses me off…

Im sorry

Why is it like this?
Why am I like this?
Second choice?
Left out?
Loser?
Okay?

My boyyy

Boston 4/15/13

Why does these things have to happen? Why are people so cruel and evil? The world we live in is so disgusting. I can’t believe this. You go to school, you get shot. You go to the movies, you get shot. You run a marathon, you get bombed. Why? This is insane. People might think that the world will end by asteroids or plague or whatever. I think we will end up bringing the end ourselves. I just don’t understand. A little eight year old girl died today in Boston, girlfriend and boyfriend were running together today. He waited at the finish line for her to propose, but she died before. Why does stuff like this need to happen? Over 115 have been wounded. Pray for Boston, the injured, the family, the friends, pray for Boston.

Secret

Ha. They don’t get it do they. Ha.
They never will. Will they? Ha. Ok I get that maybe you just can’t hear me screaming and crying for it for all these years. All the time. Working so freaking hard all these years.

Only to come up short.

You don’t understand. Oxygen is what you need to breath right. Its my oxygen. I can’t live without it. Now I can’t tell anyone. No one knows. No one will..

My secret.

Scream

WHY CANT THEY HEAR ME SCREAM AT THEM!! I SHOW THEM! I MAKE THEM FEEL IT! BUT THEY DON’T UNDERSTAND! WHY! I DON’T UNDERSTAND! OH GOD WHY! AHHHHHHHHH! LISTEN TO ME!!! YOU WANT ME TO SHOW YOU! I DO. BUT YOU DONT GET IT! YOU DON’T HEAR ME AT ALL! WHY! YOU DONT GET IT!

Please.

They say they understand.
They say they get it
They say its ok.
But its not

Easy?

Is it easier than I thought? She can do it. She IS doing it. Its coming. Congratulations. Your time is almost here! Shine bright!!!! I only wish I could. What hurts the most is seeing everyone else around it. Ha. They so happy, they so proud. It wasn’t her, or her, no, it was her, ha so close. It hurts so much. Congratulations. And she’s going. Wow so close. But so far right. Ha I never understood it till now… have a nice life out there.

When.

When will I get there? How will I get there? When do I tell them? How do I tell them? How will they react? How far will I go? How will I do?
I ask myself ALL the time. And what do I say each time?

I don’t know.

A Place

There’s a place were everyone belongs. Right? How do you know when you there.. or were you fit in? How do you know when people are telling the truth? How do you know when your were you belong? How do you know he’s the one? How do you know if they are really listening?

You don’t.. you just have to believe..

Right?